oh so true

I was watching The Simpsons and caught this little diamond on grad students. I miss the old episodes of Sipsons when they were actually funny.

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Does anyone know women?

MAD spent Friday evening at my place. We spent a calm evening in doors mostly because I am sick and didn’t quite want to go out and explore the city with a raging fever. We cooked, watched tv, talked, and we called it a night and got in bed. Soon were getting… well.. intimate. All of a sudden she wants me to stop, just climbs on top of me and lies down. I figure she just needs a break or something. The next thing I know, she is crying and sobbing. I get all nervous and start quietly panicking, but managed to keep it together, and just hugged her tight. I am not quite sure what happened, but when I asked her about it later, she said that she just got scared of a few feelings she was having. What the hell is that supposed to mean? Ok, I am not the smartest guy in the room, but even I know better than to go prod her further on this.

As always I went crawling on my knees to the almighty Google hoping it would bestow me with an answer or at the least better understanding. After about an hour of searching and reading I came out more confused than I went in. Looks like women’s psyche got the better of Google too. Oh well.

Hello All

[Antartica as seen by Rossetta Spacecraft]

So, I have been back in town for a few weeks now and things have been just fine. The whole family thing with the wedding is sorting itself at its own pace. My working relationship with QoH is pretty smooth and we are writing a book together now. The next few months in work world will be difficult but a lot of fun. I hope to work on the book, take my general exam, get a few papers out, and do some good research before the end of summer and graduate by fall. Ambitious, I know, but not impossible.

The light at the end of the tunnel..

was actually a train coming full speed at me. My sister’s wedding was canceled. A few hours before the actual wedding, we got an email from an anonymous source that the groom was already married. This started a 4 hour long intense investigation and assimilation of resources. At the end of it we found out that the groom was having a 2 year long secret homosexual affair with someone he had met online. Needless to say, my sister called the wedding off. This while is a good thing of sorts, has been quite a blow to my family. Everyone is shattered in multiple ways, and no one quite knows how to handle all this. On one side there are relatives how are being nosey or being overly supportive, on the other long subdued issues within my own family are starting to come out under the new strain. Kinda like how an earthquake provides a vent for all the stress accumulated over the years.

I am trying to pacify all of this to the best of my ability. Sometimes this is more than what I can handle. It is quite an irony that I am the strongest standing pillar of support for my family. Can there be much hope for anything that seeks to sustain and rescue itself with the help of something as feeble as me? Only time will tell. For now, all I am hoping is to bring some kind of closure to this episode, pave way for recovery, and leave my family with some hope.

At home

I am at home after over 2 years to attend my sister’s wedding. This trip is turning out to be quite a lot of fun and challenge than I expected. On one hand, it is pretty cool to meet all my relatives after a long time, on the other I am missing my solitude and peace of mind that comes with it. Lets see how things go.

I passed my quals exam!!

Countdown to Quals

My quals is scheduled for 1.30 PM on Friday, 11/9. I am pretty happy about the committee too. The professors on it this time are fairly harmless. Fingers crossed.

Stupid Adsense

Over the last couple of days, I spent sometime optimizing my Google ads, and it worked. The problem was, it worked too well. Google determined the increased clicks to be fraudulent and closed my account. A simple search reveals that this is a prevalent issue. Now how on earth am I responsible if their logic is faulty? I had $35 in my account that I would never see again. Google, you’ve disappointed me.

Confessions of an Economic Hitman

I found a couple of long videos of an interview with the author of “Confessions of an Economic Hitman”, John Perkins. If you have not read the book, I would strongly urge you to. It is either a really good work of fiction, or out right scary.

Exam Update

I still don’t have the exact date of my quals exam. I know it is sometime next week, but nothing more. I sent the dept adviser an email about this and she has promised to look into this at the earliest. I think knowing the exact date would do wonders to bring my stress levels down. Right now I will be fine if the exam is on or after next Tuesday. If its earlier there will be a lot of cramming left to do.

MAD has been really understanding and patient as I deal with the exams. She spent a few evenings at my place last week and went out of her way to make sure I was calm. I am really liking her.

Ok, I got to get off my ass and go talk to my therapist in an hour. Not fun.