Have you ever had something to say but no words to say it in? Have you ever had all the words at your beck and call, but not a single original thought within a billion miles? I am having one of later moment. Check that. A year.
I have an urge to be creative, to be [...]
The only thing keeping me from taking my own life is the thought of how it would devastate my parents. I cannot hurt them for my selfish needs.
This was a good weekend. I relaxed a bit, and was overall happy. I went car shopping with my roommates yesterday. I picked out a good car but I am having second thoughts now. Do I *really* need a car? Could $300 it would cost me every month in loan payments and insurance, be better [...]
Today I am going to submit a petition to withdraw from the quarter completely. I cannot help but think that this is entirely due to my laziness that is masquerading as depression. Why could I not just suck it up, and work my butt off? I am a utter failure.
Remember the good old days when you could get atleast a few hours of sleep every night? Since the previous Sunday, I have been running on 4-5 hrs of sleep everyday, if any. We had a visiting researcher at QoH’s lab, and I had to babysit him. He is a cool guy, but a freakin [...]
“I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.” - Groucho Marx
I have been fighting with this idea of leaving QoH for another advisor. If I stay with him, I probably will finish my PhD in about a year and half’s time.That is ofcourse assuming I get some funding from somewhere. If I leave him, I add 2 years to the time line, but there is [...]
I think today was just a bad day to start with.
First, I hear that I missed an important deadline for a project I didn’t know even existed for the course I am enrolled in. The prof told me that it is a certainty that I would get a really low grade coz of it, and [...]
We have one of our research colaborator’s visiting QoH’s lab this week. He wanted to make sure that the devices QoH developed for them actually work, and that he is not bull shitting them. Aparently, he had promised them something earlier and had lied about its’ status. So I dont blame those guys for wanting [...]
The meeting with QoH yesterday went pretty well. He was very understanding and was trying to encourage me. We spoke for about an hour and covered a wide range of topics. I actually feel a lot better about things after our talk. Kind of put things in perspective. I plan to do a few of [...]
